Celebrity Stinkers

Naomi Campbell

2007-04-24T14:11:00.000-07:00

Mmmm, mmmm, bad. Smell that is. Pancake makeup, halitosis, and hair-straightening solution. Definitely a bad call, and I ain't talking about on a cell phone.

Sanjaya Malakar

2007-04-20T07:57:00.000-07:00

He smells like loss, baby, he smells like loss.

Tara Reid

2007-01-31T07:43:00.000-08:00

She even disgusts herself. Summer's Eve, Pssssst, Shower to Shower, all combining to form one sweet stinkbomb that can't mask her grungy funk.

Justine Bateman

2007-01-29T08:52:00.000-08:00

Seems Justine Bateman has taken herself out of mothballs, but she should have showered before going back to work. On top of the mothballs, add moose musk and onions.

Lisa Edelstein

2006-12-01T13:53:00.000-08:00

Take a sniff. Coconut oil, salami, and cabbage. Get that stink outta my House!

Kevin Federline

2006-12-01T07:10:00.000-08:00

This guy can't catch a break. But he can sure catch flies. They're the only thing swooning for his aroma of sour milk, beef jerky, and bargain bin bourbon.

Daniel Craig

2006-11-09T07:43:00.000-08:00

Look at his face. This guy can even smell himself. Sour milk, toe jam, and sausage. Next Bond remake? The Spy Who Smelled Me.

Marc Anthony

2006-11-03T08:43:00.000-08:00

Come on. Just look at him. Can't you smell it? Mildew, flop sweat, and burritos. Maybe he should try wearing some of his wife's perfume.

Steve Van Zandt

2006-10-20T10:46:00.000-07:00

This meatball smells like, well, old meatballs. With a little Brylcreem, some EVOO, and chianti. At least he cleans up for the E Street Band...nevermind.

Eddie Murphy

2006-10-18T10:30:00.000-07:00

This guy has had to sweat out his share of controversy, but he could have taken a shower afterwards. Giving off the odor of gerbil funk, baby oil, and shalomar (and we ain't talking about the perfume).

Jackie Chan

2006-10-17T14:34:00.000-07:00

He's praised for performing his own stunts and reviled for producing his own stink. Cat spray, sour milk, and shrimp. Forget about kicking ass, trying cleaning it.

Sean Penn

2006-10-16T12:24:00.000-07:00

What a mess. Smell the King's Men. Cigarettes, whiskey, crusty underwear, and baked bean bellowing.

Tom Skerritt

2006-10-13T13:58:00.000-07:00

Another guy with a gas problem, but this one's a burper. Bologna, feta cheese, and beer. Did you see him fall in the pool on Brothers and Sisters? That little girl pushed him! Anything to try to wash that smell out of his mouth.

Jorja Fox

2006-10-13T13:47:00.000-07:00

How much does this one stink? Well, art imitates life. Her CSI peer, after being beaten to a pulp and with eyes swollen shut, identified her on the show by her SMELL! Belly button lint, whiskey, and dog musk. She even looks disgusted by her own armpit stench.

Victoria Beckham

2006-10-12T10:33:00.000-07:00

The air smells of wet wool, spoiled kippers, and soccer socks. Beg pardon. Football socks. Stinky Spice.

Kim Cattrall

2006-10-11T11:33:00.000-07:00

Skunk in the City. Get a whiff of horse sweat, camel spit, and motorcycle grease. What do they all have in common? The Ride.

Keanu Reeves

2006-10-10T12:26:00.000-07:00

Sure his acting stinks, but he can't help that. Did anyone even see Constanktine? His personal funk? Dude, they've made dramatic improvements in deodorants. Never mind hot and cold running water. I'm picking up french fry grease, clove cigarettes, and chianti.

Felicity Huffman

2006-10-06T11:05:00.000-07:00

I'm desperate for air when I see this one. Green cottage cheese, bologna, and peppermint schnapps.

Josh Holloway

2006-10-06T10:25:00.000-07:00

I'm picking up tuna fish, manure, and schlitz. Dude, take your funk and get Lost.

Anthony LaPaglia

2006-10-05T09:02:00.000-07:00

There's no way this guy could be lost Without a Trace, because his stink would give him away. Salami, sweaty fourth-day-in-a-row muscle T-shirt, and espresso breath.

Colin Farrell

2006-10-04T12:40:00.000-07:00

When Irish Eyes Are Smelling. Like cigarettes, guinness, jameson's, harp, miscellaneous cheap perfumes (all at the same time), and soccer sweat.

Owen Wilson

2006-10-04T08:42:00.000-07:00

The Royal Stinkin'bomb. This dude gives off burnt chocolate, dirty socks, and rubbing alcohol. And that's on a good day.

Marg Helgenberger

2006-10-03T11:58:00.000-07:00

Another crime against humanity, the stench of broccoli-cheese soup, scotch, and rancid olive oil. With a sprinkling of shower-to-shower.

Anne Heche

2006-10-03T08:05:00.000-07:00

There's something alien about the way this one smells. Bourbon, peroxide, clown white, and cumin. A stinkfest.

Ty Pennington

2006-09-29T15:35:00.000-07:00

This guy's good deeds can bring tears to your eyes, but unfortunately so can his rank odor. Acetone, turpentine, and sardines. I think somebody is in need of an Extreme Makeover.

David Caruso

2006-09-29T08:04:00.000-07:00

With his look of perpetual constipation, you know this guy has to be passing some killer gas. And the whiskey and ben-gay? it ain't gonna mask the fumes. Crime Stink Investigation.

Shannen Doherty

2006-09-29T07:44:00.000-07:00

Bevery Hills 902BO. Blistex, gin, and spoiled crab meat.

Jason Giambi

2006-09-28T12:09:00.000-07:00

This dripping mess of a meathead smells like perspiration, sweat, funk...you get the picture. The only thing bigger than the BO he gives off is his oversized head.

Larry King

2006-09-28T11:22:00.001-07:00

Can you smell it? Liverwurst and scotch. Plus shoe polish for the appropriate hair sheen.

Janice Dickinson

2006-09-28T10:18:00.002-07:00

Does botox have a scent? If it does, you know she smells like she rolled in it. Add a dash of pancake makeup, a smidge of silly putty, and a dollop of spackle, and she is the model of stinkdom.

Howie Mandel

2006-09-27T13:05:00.000-07:00

Smell or No Smell? Oh, yes, smell indeed. Like latex gloves, low tide, and Aqua Velva. Smell Elsewhere, please.

Kathryn Morris

2006-09-26T09:28:00.000-07:00

This star of Cold Case could use a hot shower to rid herself of the stench of stilton cheese and burnt coffee. And don't forget the rat poison to kill whatever might be living in her rat's nest of a hairdo.

Nicollette Sheridan and Michael Bolton

2006-09-26T09:14:00.000-07:00

Another pair of stinkmates. Tequila, hamburger grease, and rogaine.

Willie Nelson

2006-09-26T08:32:00.000-07:00

One strand of Willie's nappy horse hair would make you higher than a kite. He reeks of pot and cheetos fingers.

Mo Rocca

2006-09-26T06:33:00.001-07:00

Stinkiest. Breath. Ever. Mo Rocca needs Mo Altoids.

Dennis Rodman

2006-09-25T12:28:00.000-07:00

His autobiography? I Should Be Dead By Now. His stink? I've Been Dead in a Hot, Musty Motel Room for a Long Time. This dude's funk is a personal foul.

Paris Hilton

2006-09-25T11:19:00.000-07:00

A stench has her debutainted. Chihuahua breath, gin, and medicinal salve. Keep your distance.

Christina Aguilera

2006-09-25T11:15:00.000-07:00

This little lady put the double-R in Dirrty. Popcorn grease, dog musk, and ammonia. Move It...to the showers.

Steve-O

2006-09-25T08:46:00.000-07:00

What doesn't this "jackass" smell like. If you saw the episode where he pierced his buttcheeks together, you would say it was "intelligence".

Juliette Lewis

2006-09-25T06:27:00.000-07:00

This pothead smells like Mary Jane and a shot of Jagermeister shoved down the toilet. That's a Natural Born Killer.

Woody Harrelson

2006-09-22T12:10:00.000-07:00

This guy may not have irritable bowel syndrome, but his gas problem is irritating to us. For someone who cares so much about the environment, he manages to pollute the air of every room he enters. Natural Airborne Killer.

Whitney Houston

2006-09-22T11:42:00.000-07:00

Houston, we have a problem. And it smells like sulfur, spoiled chicken, and Thunderbird. Who needs a Bodyguard when know one wants to be within 10 feet of your stank?

Chuck Norris

2006-09-22T10:53:00.000-07:00

Chuck Norris invented the word stink by roundhousing a skunk in a dumpster. An anagram for Walker Texas Ranger is KARATE WRANGLER SEX. That pretty much sums up his aroma.

David Spade

2006-09-22T10:48:00.000-07:00

This dude has to be a magician, because it sure ain't his smell casting a spell on the ladies. Bologna, coffee breath, and ink from the pages of playboy magazine. Just cinch it.

Holly Hunter

2006-09-22T08:21:00.000-07:00

Since winning the Oscar for The Piano, her sense of style seems a bit out of tune. Could that be gangrenous finger stumps, dried bra sweat, and garlic I smell?

Nicole Richie

2006-09-22T08:05:00.000-07:00

I'm sensing bulimic barf, cat spray, and olive oil. You want The Simple Life? Eat something and take a shower.

Angelina Jolie

2006-09-22T07:24:00.000-07:00

Yeah, she’s beautiful, but after all that time in Africa? I’m thinking elephant piss, monkey spew, and pitt balls. Not necessarily in that order.

Rosie O'Donnell

2006-09-22T07:12:00.000-07:00

From her View she thinks her grooming habits are up to snuff. But from where I'm standing, her B.O. is in A League of Her Own

Jack Nicholson

2006-09-22T05:58:00.000-07:00

Smells like 3 day old vomit he rolled in two days ago, bourbon, and spicy fries. Looks like it too. And, of course, ciggies.

Mickey Rourke

2006-09-21T14:15:00.000-07:00

This odor bomb is comprised of a cocktail of cigarettes soaking in a jar of water, old spice, 5 day old men's pee stained and skid marked underwear (but not his because Mickey goes commando), and cheap scotch. Put on the map for his role in 9 1/2 weeks, that was actually the last time this guy took a shower. And Sin City...try Stink City.

Harrison Ford

2006-09-21T12:59:00.000-07:00

Life has not been kind to dear old Han. Get a whiff of Ally McBroads, booze, and bratwurst.

Nick Nolte

2006-09-21T12:44:00.000-07:00

No explanation necessary.

Viggo Mortensen

2006-09-21T12:31:00.000-07:00

He may look good ladies, but this dude's stench will hit you with the smell of old meat and whiskey.

Jessica Simpson

2006-09-21T12:06:00.000-07:00

Textbook case of smelly feet and wicked wretched breath masked with fruit flavored lip gloss.

Billy Bob Thornton

2006-09-21T08:55:00.000-07:00

A classic stinker. Think Billy Bob Thornton and you’ve got skunked beer, sweat, and dried pee.

Russell Crowe & Danielle Spencer

2006-09-21T08:51:00.000-07:00

Another pair of stinkmates. We’ve got spilt Guinness, stinky sweaty socks, and stale cigs. And let’s throw in a little burnt shrimp on the barbie.

Pamela Anderson

2006-09-21T08:48:00.000-07:00

As Kid Rock’s stinkmate, Pamela Anderson emits the odors of stale cigarettes, scotch, and crotch.

Lindsay Lohan

2006-09-21T08:42:00.000-07:00

The young try to grow up much too fast. That’s why she reeks of Love’s Baby Soft, cigarettes, and mojito puke.

Madonna

2006-09-20T17:11:00.000-07:00

Uh. Duh. I wonder what's smellier: her hairy armpits or her performance in Swept Away?

Kid Rock

2006-09-19T18:05:00.000-07:00

Oily hair, skanky women, budweiser, and 3 day old sex. And those are the good smells coming off his body.

Camryn Manheim

2006-09-19T12:01:00.000-07:00

Ms. Manhands looks like she smells like old cigars and patchoulli.

Tyne Daly

2006-09-19T11:39:00.000-07:00

Cagney and Lacey? Try Gagney and Pastey. Cuz that's the taste in my mouth when I think of how much she must reek.

Ethan Hawke

2006-09-19T11:34:00.000-07:00

You just know this dude is a stinker. And it doesn't make your idea of him any better when you think of him chomping down on his teammate's ass meat after the plane crash in the Andes either.

Welcome to Celebrity Stinker

2006-09-19T11:17:00.000-07:00

You may not know them personally. You may not even have the sense of smell. But there is no doubt they are stinkers. No, we don't have hard proof. But we have eyes and we have hunches. And they don't lie.